I hate times like tonight. When I cry for being happy and sad at the same time. I hate that people tell me they know better than me. They are wrong. I put to them how they could have sat in my living room this evening and disagree with my decision.
Tonight I watched as Addison giggled and jumped around trying to play with her brother, as most siblings do. It was the cutest thing I have ever seen in my life, she was like a little puppy with a bone, who after nearly 10 minutes finally admitted defeat, as the bone aka Grayson did not respond, apart from shying away. I watched as Addy couldn’t understand why, she is too young to explain too. That day will come.
So when people frequently these past months make apparent their views on why I should not try for another baby I put to you why should Addison feel like an only child, why should I as a parent watch and feel helpless at times like these.
Your reasons maybe valid, (these are what people keep directing to me – I don’t necessarily agree)
I still have PND
We aren’t financially stable
We have little time already
I am too overweight
We could have another disabled child
We don’t have the room
I couldn’t cope with Addy as a baby
But to name a few, but I believe I am a good Mummy, could I be better, hell yeah, but one thing I argue with anyone is I love my babies, both of them and I want a happy life for us all.
Why should I admit defeat and not have the family I dreamed of because life took an unusual turn for us. This is my life and wrong or right happiness will always be the key.
